Monday, August 26, 2013

Put a paper bag on his head!

One of my favorite jokes of all times, very inappropriately shared by my boss at a fast food joint when i was merely 14.5. he was kind of a perv and always made me feel uncomfortable but this joke is still a fave. it's not PG rated so beware.

So there was this man who had no land, no money, no job, nothing...and he comes across an ad in a paper : "5000 acres of farm land, beautiful house in middle of plot, plus team of farmhands already employed for sale in exchange for my daughter's hand in marriage."

The young man thought "score!!!! she cant be that bad! and if nothing else, i'll just throw a bag on her head in bed."

So he called up the man who placed the ad, things were settled, and he was soon married, and comfortably installed in his new home.  His wife, Thelma, was tall, thin, blond, blue-eyed... but... her blue eyes were bug-eyes, she was slow-witted, buck toothed, crooked nosed,and just generally homely. 

One day he was on the roof hammering and he hit his thumb and yelled out "F*%@!"

Thelma came poking and santering past saying (and youhave to say this with a slow, mentaly challenged accent for full impact) "get tha bag, get tha bag, get tha bag..."

So, Tini, i like your idea better, put the bag on his head instead ;)

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